How Do You Respond When a Healthcare Professional Makes Assumptions About Your Bisexuality?

Discussing bisexuality with a healthcare professional can be useful when it is relevant to your care, but the conversation does not always feel respectful.

A doctor, nurse, counsellor, therapist, or sexual-health provider may make assumptions based on your orientation rather than asking about your actual circumstances.

They may assume that your current partner reveals your sexuality, that bisexuality means multiple partners or non-monogamy, that you have particular sexual practices, or that your orientation automatically places you in a certain risk category.

Others may ask intrusive questions that feel more curious than medically necessary.

These experiences can make people reluctant to mention bisexuality at all, especially if they expect judgement, disbelief, stereotyping, or pressure to educate the professional themselves.

Good care should focus on relevant information.

That may include your actual relationships, sexual practices, symptoms, health concerns, testing needs, medication, mental wellbeing, reproductive health, and the support you are seeking.

Your bisexual orientation alone does not provide those answers.

It can be difficult to challenge assumptions in a healthcare setting.

There may be a power imbalance, limited appointment time, fear of being dismissed, concern about medical records, or simply the feeling that you should not have to correct a professional while trying to receive care.

Depending on the situation, you may choose to:

• correct an assumption directly;
• answer only what is relevant;
• ask why a question is medically necessary;
• redirect the conversation toward your actual behaviour or concern;
• request another clinician;
• bring a trusted person when appropriate;
• or disclose less when the information is not needed for informed care.

You are allowed to ask for clarification.

For example:

“Can you explain why that question is relevant to my care?”

or:

“My orientation does not tell you my sexual behaviour. What information do you actually need?”

Sometimes the issue is not overt hostility but unfamiliarity.

A professional may use the wrong language, assume bisexuality means equal attraction, or overlook that someone can be bisexual in a monogamous or straight-looking relationship.

A respectful response should involve listening, correcting the assumption, and returning the focus to the person’s actual healthcare needs.

Bisexual people should not have to choose between receiving appropriate care and being treated with dignity.

Have you experienced assumptions about bisexuality in healthcare?

Was the issue related to sexual health, relationships, mental health, partner assumptions, risk, or something else?

What helped you advocate for yourself—or what made it difficult to do so?

And what would have made the interaction feel more respectful and medically relevant?

Please protect your privacy and avoid identifying individual professionals or clinics. Personal experiences can be useful to discuss, but they are not a substitute for individual medical advice.